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'Just hold on:' Suicide survivor shares hope during Pride Month

myra smith
Posted at 6:00 AM, Jun 07, 2023
and last updated 2023-07-13 07:01:37-04

HAMPTON, Va. — Pride Month is a time to celebrate the LGBTQ+ community while shining a light on the hardships they face.

Studies show this group, which is often victimized and discriminated against, experiences depression at a higher rate.

According to the American Public Health Association Journal, 17 percent of lesbian, gay and bisexual people attempted suicide in their lifetimes, compared to just over two percent of the general U.S. population.

“It's not just a bad day,” said suicide survivor and celebrated Hampton Roads singer Myra Smith. “It's being in the darkest place, in the lowest place, and not being able to see your way out – not being able to breathe.”

myra smith

Smith, who developed depression at the age of six when a family member raped her, has tried to die by suicide three times as an adult. One of those attempts happened after she came out, and her church and family rejected her.

“I just kept saying ‘I want to sleep forever,'" said Smith. “I didn't want to live another day knowing that these things have happened to me.”

Smith said she’s grateful she survived, and she uses her platform as a singer, author and pastor to encourage others in a dark place to hold on.

“If you could just hold on a little bit, just wait another day. Greater is coming,” said Smith, who has gotten married to a woman and expanded her family in the years since her suicide attempts. “After living and having all these great things happen, I would have never been able to know this love.”

myra smith

Psychologist and post-traumatic stress disorder expert Dr. Kristie Norwood said depression can be triggered by stress, trauma and a genetic predisposition if there’s a family history. Previous research has also linked depression to a chemical imbalance in the brain.

“Depression is really this sadness that lingers,” said Dr. Norwood. “Medication and therapy together can often be the best course of treatment for depression.”

Smith said that combination has kept her alive through the bad days so she can experience the good days.

“Not today,” said Smith as she referenced a tattoo with those words on her arms. “[When] I woke up [after] one of the times [I tried to die by suicide], I tattooed [those words] on my arm. We're not going to kill ourselves today. I did that on purpose, because if I can just make it one day at a time, I've made it.”

As a part of Smith's healing, she's hosting a sexual assault survivor support festival (SASS) at Oozlefinch Beers & Blending on August 11, 2023, from 6 p.m. to 11 p.m.

If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please call or text the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.

The Trevor Project also provides confidential support for LGBTQ youth in crisis, 24 hours a day, seven days a week at 1-866-488-7386. There’s also a 24/7 confidential online instant messaging with a Trevor counselor.

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention also provides a list of resources for the LGBTQ+ community. There are also support groups for suicide survivors in our area, and ways to find a therapist near you.